Sunday, February 17, 2013

Mom grieves for son who got missing 10 years ago “I’m hopeful I will see him again”



The Dickson family have been in a depressed state since their son went missing 10 years ago. However, they are still hopeful that he will be found writes MOTUNRAYO ABODERIN
It’s been 10 years since Mrs. Florence Dickson last saw her son, Felix. However, the memory seems like yesterday.
“It feels as if I saw him yesterday. Ten years seem like just a day to me,” she said.
Dickson, who found it hard to express her pain in words, said her only desire was to see her son again. Felix was 34 years old when he was declared missing.

“One fateful morning, at our family house in Otukpo, Benue State, I woke up around 7am to have my morning devotion. Then my son, who lived at the boys quarters, came into my room and requested that we prayed together.
“That was unusual, he hardly came into my room in the morning and he rarely insisted that we pray together. I should have known something was wrong, but I couldn’t imagine anything that could have gone wrong with him,” she said.
The mother, who did want her photograph published, stated that after the prayer, he asked her to prepare Chicken Pepper Soup.
Dickson said, “I went to the market to buy pepper soup ingredients. After I prepared it, he ate but didn’t finish it. He only sipped a few spoons and went back to his room. But I didn’t notice his countenance or any unusual behaviour. Later in the afternoon, my daughter called me on the phone and asked after him.
“I assumed he was in his room, but when I got to the room, he wasn’t there. I checked the whole compound but I didn’t find him. At that moment, I began to panic. I waited for him till evening, but my son didn’t come back home.”
Dickson, who lost her first son some years ago, said Felix beckoned to her as he stepped out of the house but she did not understand why he did so.
“While I was outside tidying up some things, I remember seeing him walking out of the gate and signalling to me, but I didn’t understand what he meant. I find it hard to believe that he walked out of the house with the intention of not returning.
“I’m deeply hurt. Why would he do that? I just wish I knew where he is.  But I have hope that I will see him again. I believe he is somewhere out there,” she said.
Felix’s depressed state
Before his disappearance, Felix a graduate of the University of Science and Technology, Bauchi State, ventured into business. He had businesses in Abuja and Benue. After the death of his father, Felix took up the challenge of playing his father’s role as the head of the family.
His elder sister, Ms. Lami Dickson said, “When our father died, my brother was devastated.  He was terribly hurt.  However, he tried to be the father of the house. He wanted to protect and provide for the family so badly. He always made sure everyone was doing fine and that there was nothing lacking in the house. I felt the burden on him was too much.
“Prior to his disappearance, he complained to us that his businesses weren’t doing too well and that he was running at a loss. We encouraged him and advised that he sold the family’s caterpillar  vehicle to support his business. Apart from failed businesses, he was disappointed by male and female friends.
“He was not a troublemaker. Rather he was trustworthy and caring. But when all these issues came up, he took to drinking and started keeping bad friends. He stopped calling us, and he became reserved. Sometimes, he would go out without informing anyone.”
Lami said the problem was compounded as none of his family members knew his new friends, adding that his sudden change in behaviour showed that he was hanging with bad friends.
When the family reported to the police at Otukpo, the policemen on duty according to Lami, advised the family not to worry since Felix was capable of taking care of himself.
“We also reported the case to the Police Public Relations unit in Ikeja, G.R.A, Lagos, but our effort was to no avail.
“During this period, strange  things happened. “The first was that the family’s caterpillar was no where to be found.  Secondly, the money in his account was withdrawn.
“The police in Otukpo arrested the person who withdrew the money, but when they interrogated him, he said my brother gave him the cheque to withdraw the money. We heard the suspect was released some days later,” she added.
Family’s traumatic state
The family said Felix’s disappearance had brought pains to them.
“The past 10 years have been the toughest years of my life. Imagine not knowing where your child is? Every day, I think about him. The whole thing feels overwhelming. But what keeps me going is that I believe I will see him again. I know God has not forsaken me; He will surely answer my prayer someday. I have friends and church members praying with me. They encourage me whenever I feel sad. We all believe Felix will resurface,” his mother said.
Lami also has the belief that Felix is alive and would be found. “I will continue to do whatever it takes to find him. I believe all this will be over very soon. I’m a child of God and in the Bible, everyone that went missing was later found. I have hope that my brother will be found,” she added.
While she holds on to her belief that Felix would be found, she is worried that his disappearance had affected their mother’s health.
“No mother can be at peace knowing that her child is missing. My mother has been very worried for the past 10 years. I want her to regain her strength. I care so much about her and I want her to be happy again,” she said.
Lami said her siblings in Kaduna State and England were also worried, adding that they had never imagined that it would take this long to unravel Felix’s whereabouts.
“We never thought it would get to 10 years. We have already used different media to help us locate him but they have been to no avail. We don’t know what else to do. I can’t wait for this to be over,” she stated.
False alarms
Lami added that the family’s hope was raised in the past by people who raised a false alarm. While appealing to whoever has information on Felix to help the family, she said raising a false alarm would only add to the family’s trauma.
“At the initial stage of his disappearance, we used to receive calls that he was seen either in Liberia or South Africa. But when we inquired from these people who claimed to have seen him, they would back out.
“Once, our landlord’s son said he saw him somewhere. Then another day, a friend said she saw him on Allen Avenue, Lagos. She claimed he was carrying a black bag. But after some time, we didn’t hear from her again.
“It has becoming unbearable. His disappearance has lingered for so long. We want to know what happened to our brother. I miss him. If I were to see him today, I don’t think I will be angry at him for disappearing,” she said.


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